Flaming Gamers

I recently mentioned the Kickstarter of FeministFrequency. Since then I noticed that the YouTube video for the project has been flooded with the most vile and aggressive comments. It seems like there were some campaigns on 4chan about it.

More examples on the Feminist Frequency Tumblr.

Frankly, this surprised me. I knew that sexism is an issue among gamers, but I was shocked by the sheer amount of prejudice and hatred displayed there. Sure, many of them were probably just 4chan trolls. But the huge response this one video was able to generate is not as easily explained.

Call me idealist and naive, but I generally believe that most people in the world actually mean well and that incidents like this come down to a misunderstanding caused by different perspectives clashing against each other. I spent an evening engaging some of the people posting there. I wanted to understand what perspective would lead somebody to argue this way. Here are some observations. I should state upfront that this is NOT a justification for this kind of behavior. It’s an effort to understand those people so we can approach them more effectively.

• Cognitive Dissonance – Most people posting there would call themselves gamers and care about games deeply. They enjoy games a lot. In many ways, games define their very lifestyle. Also, it seems most people posting there don’t consider themselves sexist. A lot of the arguments are actually in favor of fairness as a principle. Being confronted with a video that labels their most beloved characters and the gamers themselves as sexist causes massive amounts of cognitive dissonance. The thought process goes like this

  1. “I don’t want to treat women badly.”
  2. “Yet this video says I do.”
  3. “Hence, this video must be wrong.”

  Starting from this premise, they continue arguing against the video. It’s important to understand that the posters here feel threatened and “against the wall”. If they would lose the argument, they would be forced to admit that they are sexist. That’s something they are deeply disturbed by and feel an urge to avoid at all costs.

• Defending games – As gamers, many of the people posting there have been defending games against what they feel are similar accusations – against accusations of games causing violence or being stupid or a waste of time or inferior to books and movies. Additionally, gamer culture is full of their own issues to fight about like exploitative DLC, aggressive DRM, the influx of casual shovelware, console wars or simply regular trash talk and flaming. The posters here often come “fresh from the fight”. They are constantly in need to defend “their territory”. A video like this represents for them something they don’t need – yet another front to wage war on. They unquestionably feel like the feminist approach is something directed against what they want. They also feel like it’s coming “from the outside” of gaming. Many of the arguments seem to be aimed at exposing the video’s author as a non-gamer. Other arguments seem to suggest that there are more pressing matters to solve first.

• A Teenager’s Perspective – One very important thing to keep in mind – especially on YouTube – is that the vast majority of people posting here are underage. A quick sampling of the poster’s favored videos or simply the spelling reveals that there are hardly any proper adults involved in those kinds of flame wars.

  This may explain the inflammatory language and the stubbornness. But there is more to it. Most of the posters are in High School right now and going through puberty. They are going trough a time of intense social pressure from all sides. There is hardly anybody, who manages to get trough High School without experiencing some kind of bullying and oppression. At the same time, engaging in first romantic encounters is often horribly awkward and frustrating. So in the midst of that, suddenly hearing that you are not the victim and it’s all your fault instead can feel like overwhelming injustice. It enhances the cognitive dissonance mentioned above even more.

• How Do I Fit Into This? – Finally, I think there is a general impression of being left behind. The gamers posting here feel like the feminist cause is not about them, not for them and that there is nothing for them to do here except being the scape goat. They are perhaps even jealous. Here is somebody standing up for women. But if you are not a woman, who is standing up for the things you fight for? The gamers posting here feel like they are being upstaged by people, who have don’t have as much of a stake in this subjects as they do. They feel like the tables are being turned on them. They have been playing musical chairs for quite some time, the music is stopping and the only chair is taken by a newcomer that just came in. They want to still have a word on this, yet they feel the only role the feminist movement seem to offer them is being the villain.

Again, none of this is suppose to excuse hateful posts. The idea was to put myself in the shoes of those people. In fact, I often realized that I’m arguing with a teenage version of myself. Of course, there may be a great deal of my own projection going on here. But I noticed I was often able to diffuse the situation by appealing to the posters in the right way. In fact, many of the posters turned out to be quite reasonable and keen to discuss the subject on a more productive level. Here are some things I found out work well:

• Avoid Generalization – Generalized arguments like Rape Culture or Patriarchal Society are highly problematic in establishing a discourse. They are perceived as unfair blanket statements that cause the cognitive dissonance mentioned above. Not that they are necessarily wrong. They just tend to push males “against the wall”. Once Patriarchal Society is mentioned, all males feel accused as oppressors. Once Rape Culture is mentioned, all males feel accused of being rapists. It’s important to be very precise about who is being accused of what.

• Find Examples to Agree On – Male gamers sometimes feel that feminists want to make games worse. I noticed that focusing on positive examples everybody agrees on is a good way to introduce the idea that we are actually all on the same side. Mentioning games like Portal 2 or Quentin Tarantino movies or TV series like Firefly often has an amazing effect of completely turning people around. What also works is to agree on negative examples. Twilight has a way of galvanizing people.

• Appeal to Their Love for Games – Gamers know very well that there is a lot wrong with games. They are constantly arguing for games to improve in one way or another. They are eager to learn what makes a good game. It can be effective to appeal to that passion and show that having female characters will make games better for everybody. I found posters often turned around when I said I want to use the videos to teach my students how to write better characters.

• Give Credit – Many of the posters point out some valid arguments among all the flaming. For example, they often point out counter-examples of positive female characters in games. I found it’s important to give them credit for those arguments, even if they use them to discredit a feminist standpoint. It can help a great deal of taking away the pressure and leveling the playing field for a more productive discussion.

• Offer Opportunities – It’s important not to just blindly shoot down all the arguments and accusations. If the posters were proven wrong, they would need to admit that they are sexist. As strange as it may seem, that’s the opposite of what they are trying to do. Instead, provide opportunities for them to prove that they mean well. At least provide them opportunities to explain and voice their concerns in a more productive and civilized manner. Encourage them to write blog posts and make their own videos. Make sure they don’t feel like their point of view is irrelevant. It’s the easiest way to escalate the flame war.

I don’t claim that the above ideas always work. Some of the posters are just trolls or simply sexist after all. It’s not an easy thing to pull off either. But I do believe it’s worth trying. It can be incredibly rewarding to be able to connect with those people. It can shed a completely different light on the discussion. After just a few interactions I am convinced that this is less an issue of fight against hatred. It is more an issue of misunderstanding.

This gamer was actually wondering about some of the paradoxes of gender representation himself.

This gamer apparently just wants games to improve.

So far this has been a fascinating project. I’m looking forward to see what the actual videos by FeministFrequency will bring. Despite of the apparent hatred they already summoned, I hope at least some gamers will take the chance to realize that we are all in the same boat.